Interest or not

Tag: travel

  • Thankful and grateful

    I’m thankful and grateful for the life I’m living. I woke up on my bed this morning safe and sound in my home. I live in Medford Oregon. I live in an apartment where I’m writing this post. The walls in my home are solid. The ceiling and roof are solid. I have air conditioning and a heater, plumbing and electricity and internet service.

    My home is furnished with my possession’s. The property management company regularly maintains the apartment buildings and responds quickly to maintenance issues and repairs them. I feel safe when I’m in my neighborhood day or night. I have a patio outside the front door where I have a lawn chair and often sit enjoying the outside environment.

    I have 5 large windows in my home, 4 of which I can open for fresh air behind screens that keep pests out. I have curtains on all the windows I keep closed for my privacy and open to let sunlight in and for views of my neighborhood. I am respected in my community and valued as a resident and an employee.

    This morning I brought my dog to a nearby park where I walked her on her leash. Then I drove us home and parked on the parking lot for the apartment buildings. There are stores and cafes and a grocery store all within walking distance from my home. There is a good hospital that is a beacon to the community two blocks from my home. There are hiking trails in the nearby mountains.

    I am living the life I dreamed of and yearned for five years ago. My life has changed in many ways during the last five years. I am 48 and have a long life to live. I can travel on vacations around United States and internationally. I can visit my family in Colorado and in Georgia and in Florida.

    I am strong and I am healthy. People at Church welcome me and are glad to see me. Yesterday I went out to eat at a restaurant where I was waited on and served a delicious meal made to order. Then I went grocery shopping.

    Everything I wrote about on this post are blessings I relish in. I just got back home several minutes ago. I was driving around town looking for something to do and stopped at a cafe where I purchased a cup of fresh brewed hot coffee. The women at work at the cafe were pleasant and gave me good service. The coffee I sipped on the drive home and it was delicious.

    There are good work opportunities in my community and I’ve been employed part time for nearly 4 years.

    Life is perfect for no one. There are challenges every human experiences. Challenges are a blessing, with challenges are opportunities to grow stronger and make healthy decisions.

    I am clean and I smell like juniper scented deodorant and cologne. My clothes are clean and in good condition and fit me well. I cut my hair yesterday and trimmed my beard this morning. I trimmed my finger nails. I brushed my teeth with a good tooth brush and toothpaste. I have strong eyesight. I can hear well the environment around me including the people I come in contact with and speak to. I speak for myself and I involve myself in healthy conversations with the people in my life.

    I am at home alone often and alone now. My dog is resting on the floor in my dining room. I am not alone when I’m in my community. I can invite people who I like as guests in to my home.

  • Health Care & abiding by the Law

    I have so much to be grateful for. Grateful and thankful. After being homeless for 6 years then through police intervention I was put in the environment where recovery was possible. At the time I didn’t like being locked in the psychiatric hospital and that is where I needed to be. While in the psychiatric hospital I began recovering. My health improved and I was transported to a different psychiatric care treatment center where I continued to recover. At the second psychiatric care treatment center I was told that I can leave when ever I want. It didn’t make sense to me at the time. I still had a lot of recovering to do. During the day I participated in group therapy sessions, ate three hot meals a day, exercised, got fresh air outside, read books, watched TV and was able to keep to myself when I didn’t want to be around other people. I stayed inside the treatment center and went outside only on the treatment center property.

    A representative with Social Services contacted me while I was recovering at the treatment center. I was told that I got to choose where I would go when I was scheduled to leave.

    There were two options available for me. At the time I had no posessions other than the clothes I wore and a backpack with supplies in it for living outdoors. I had no money and no savings then.

    The treatment center was located in Grants Pass Oregon. I knew nothing about Grants Pass and knew no one in Grants Pass other than the other patients I met while I was in the treatment center and the members of the staff.

    I had never visited Grants Pass before being placed in the treatment center and for this reason I did not know my way around the community.

    There is a foster care Mission for adult men in Grants Pass that gave me an invitation to live at their Mission. The Social Services representative scheduled a time when I could take a tour of the Mission and met me at the treatment center then drove me to the Mission and went on the tour with me.

    I didn’t want to live in the Mission and told the Social Services representative. The representative with Social Services had one more option for me.

    There was a foster care Mission for Adult men and women in Medford that gave me an invitation to live at their Mission. The Social Services representative scheduled a time when I could take a tour of the Mission in Medford and met me at the treatment center then drove me to the Mission in Medford and took the tour with me.

    I liked the Mission in Medford and could see myself living there. I had more recovery to do. I was told that I could move to the Mission in Medford but first I had to have the warrant for me dropped. I needed to go to the Jail in Medford and have my fingerprints taken before they could drop the warrant.

    Soon enough the day came when I would be released from the treatment center. The Social Services representative met me at the treatment center and before I was released a member of the Staff gave me a care bag with things I would need that included a supply of my prescribed medication and toiletries and snacks.

    The Social Services representative drove me to a motel in Medford and paid for a room for me for one month. The next day the Social Services representative met me at the motel and drove me to a pantry that donated food to me. Then the Social Services representative drove me to a Good Will Store where he helped me buy some cooking equipment to use with the microwave in the motel room. The motel room had a minifridge where I kept the perishable food.

    I had a food benefit card and a library card and during the day I bought a few snacks at a Store near the motel and walked to the Public Library where I looked at books and found one I liked and checked out.

    I had been in a psychiatric hospital and then in a psychiatric treatment center for three months and not used to making my own schedule and having a place to stay and being able to stay and leave when I choose. My prescribed medication was helping me a lot and I still had recovery to do. I was not used to having my own room and kitchenette and bathroom all to myself.

    I was not used to feeling safe and secure and having privacy at the same time while inside.

    These days I rent an apartment in Medford Oregon. I went back to work part time. I have a pet therapy dog and I schedule appointments with a therapist when I want to. I live in a safe residential neighborhood several blocks away from a hospital and shopping centers. I have a car and I buy groceries and do all the errands I need to on my own.

    I’ve gone on several vacations since getting back into housing. I flew to Colorado and then to Florida where I rented a car and drove to my families home to visit. The beach was wonderful. Then I flew back to Colorado and rode a bus to the community where my family lives and they picked me up at the bus station. I stayed with family in Colorado and enjoyed being in my home town knowing I had a good home to go back to in Oregon. I flew back to Oregon and picked up my car at the airport parking lot in Medford, paid for parking and drove home. Then I picked up my dog from the woman I hired to pet sit while I was away and brought my dog home.

    I remember during my month stay at the motel in Medford several days after I checked in I was visiting the Public Library and logged in at a Public Computer where I did a search online for where in Medford I could go to pick up more medication in my prescription.

    I walked to the Jail and got my fingerprints taken. The rest of the time during that month I stayed in the motel room a whole lot. It was June 2021 and the hottest recorded day in Medford in late June. The warrant was dropped.

    It was July 3rd and I was ready to leave the motel the next morning. I checked out at the front desk and my mom met me at the motel and drove me to the Mission. The Mission office was closed July 4th and I had already checked out of the motel. My mom drove me to a different motel and paid for a room for me where I stayed the night.

    The next morning I checked out of the motel and walked to the Mission. It had been 4 months since I walked that far and my backpack was filled with my things. I remember the backpack feeling very heavy under the hot July sun rays.

    At the Mission office a member of the Staff met me and began my orientation meeting where I agreed to treat everyone with respect and respect the property and participate in the daily bible study courses and go to church services every Sunday, and do chores every day to help keep the Mission clean. I agreed to all the rules that included I would stay celibate and not seek employment and not work and that I would check out at the desk before leaving the property and indicate when I would return before leaving and that I would be back on the property every night by 8pm and that I would stay on the property in the men’s dorm room on the bed every night while I was a resident of the Mission.

    I just got back home a few minutes ago. I have the day off work. I drove across town to a restaurant that makes delicious made to order sandwiches. I ate a lettuce turkey cranberry jelly croissant with a pickle spear on the side and salt and vinegar potato chips at a table. The restaurant was busy and the meal was spot on.

    I continued recovering at the Mission. I volunteered in the kitchen and helped prepare meals for the residents and the staff. The dining area welcomes the Medford community to eat a free dinner at the Mission every night of the week. I stayed at the Mission for almost 6 months. While I was in adult foster care my mom helped me apply for SSDI. While waiting for an answer from Social Security I continued to volunteer in the kitchen and participated in bible study every day and went to church services every Sunday. Sometimes I would leave for the afternoon and my mom would pick me up outside the Mission and we’d eat lunch at a restaurant. I enjoyed visiting the Public Library during the day.

    One day I received a response to my application with Social Security for SSDI. I was awarded SSDI. Before I was homeless I worked as an employee for many years since I was 15. Because I paid taxes on my income since I started working and because a Psychiatrist diagnosed me as having schizophrenia I was awarded money from SSDI. My award from SSDI enabled me to buy a car. I started receiving monthly payments from SSDI. I had enough money to move out of the Mission, out of adult foster care and out on my own.

    Very many men women volunteers and health care workers made the life I live possible. People I did not know donated food, water, medicine, and shelter. People volunteered their time working hands on with homeless people I was one of. People with financial wealth donated money to charities I benefited from.

    I have many blessings. Life is good.

    After the warrant was dropped a court date was scheduled for me to be present at. An attorney was assigned to my case free of charge because I could not afford to hire an attorney. There was a back log of cases ahead of me and my court date kept being postponed. During this time I met with the Attorney who was defending me several times in his office to prepare his defense.

    The day finally came when I was scheduled to be present in court and the Judge had time to hear my case. In court I had an opportunity to apologize to everyone present for the crime I was accused of and I apologized. The Judge told me what I could not do in the future and that I was being placed on bench probation.

    I was ordered to meet with a psychiatrist regularly and a therapist regularly for as long as they required. I was told that I needed to take my prescribed medication for the rest of my life. I agreed with everything the Judge ordered and told me to do. I have been taking my prescribed medication every day since my rehabilitation began. I went to every scheduled meeting with the psychiatrist and the therapist for as long as they wanted me to.

    I’m not from here. I’m from Colorado, half way across the country from Oregon. I was homeless for two years when I arrived in Oregon and remained homeless in Oregon for four more years before police intervened and put me in the psychiatric hospital environment where I began to recover.

    Since I moved to Oregon to be closer to my family who were living in Oregon and the North West while I was homeless, they all moved away to the Eastern Coast of United States. I have a large family and they all live very far away from Southern Oregon.

    I met few people while I was homeless and did not make friends with other homeless people. I knew no one in the North West other than my family before I arrived in Oregon.

    Being in a new to me community is a blessing because where I’m from in Colorado the people I called friends where all bad influences on me. They were either selling illegal drugs or doing illegal drugs or both and I was an addict. My addiction to illegal drugs was a major reason that led me to homelessnes.

    In Oregon I don’t know anyone outside of work and Church and where I’ve volunteered. I knew a woman I dated for two years since getting back into housing. I haven’t seen her in over a year and that is fine by me. It wasn’t meant to be.

    I completed bench probation and after four years of good behavior my legal record is expunged.

    My background check comes back clean and clear. An Employer can hire me and I can compete in the work force with the best of them.

    It’s good to be me. It’s good to play by the rules. Life is good

  • Couldn’t sleep

    I was asleep but felt stressed so here I am writing at 11pm on my blog.

    I live in low income housing. Everyone who has a unit in the apartment complex where I do struggles to some extent with their mental health (me included). That’s how the property and property management designed the complex and picked us tenants.

    Police being called to the apartments is not uncommon. Earlier today an ambulance was called to the apartments. I genuinely care about my neighbors, even the ones I don’t speak to anymore. I wish them health and peace and that they are able to stay sober.

    I saw which apartment the ambulance pulled up to and from prior ambulance visits I guessed who the paramedic’s were checking on. I didn’t stop cooking or go out and ask anyone anything. The scene is common where I live and confirming who the paramedic’s were helping didn’t make sense.

    Later in the afternoon a drunk man I recognize was visiting a tenant at the apartment when he got angry, mad, belligerent and took someone’s walker and destroyed it kicking it down the street. Several hours later he came back still drunk and mad and started to destroy a patio chair outside one apartment, yelling nonsense the whole time.

    I called 911 as he walked away and reported the incident. I got a call from a Police Officer soon after. They had the man in custody and asked if anyone wanted to be the “victim” in order to press charges. Now I was involved. The property that was damaged wasn’t mine. I knocked on the neighbors door and said I had the Police on the phone and asked if anyone wanted to press charges. It turns out that the walker that was damaged was not the good walker and no one wanted to press charges.

    I went to the other apartment and looked at the patio chair that the culprit tried to damage and after looking close, the chair had taken a beating without any damage that I could see.

    I told the Police Officer no-one wanted to press charges and that he disturbed the peace and was drunk. The Officer confirmed my name and I thanked him. That was it. It is illegal to be drunk in public and a disorderly, nuisance. I don’t know what happened to the culprit, hopefully he doesn’t come back.

    That’s not why I woke up. The incident regarding the drunk man who damaged a cheap walker was handled to my satisfaction.

    I think I woke up because of something that happened at work yesterday. I was working for the temp to hire employment staffing agency scheduled as a driver for a rental car company. I was hired to drive a rental car from Medford to the Eugene Airport and then ride back in a van with the other drivers to Medford.

    Once each driver had arrived at our meetup location at Eugene Airport and all the rental cars had been delivered we waited for two vans to be prepared for us to ride back to Medford in.

    A temp to hire employee who had driven from Medford to Eugene Airport in a rental car was chosen to drive one van of passengers to Medford. I rode in the van the temp to hire employee was chosen to drive. A manager with the rental car company drove the other van with passengers to Medford.

    The ride back was mostly uneventful and smooth but not 100% and that’s why I’m writing this post. I don’t expect a driver to be the very best driver on the road, but I do expect the driver to be safe and courteous. On the drive to Medford I was one of three passengers who sat on the row of seats directly behind the driver and the passenger in front. There were 11 of us total in the van including the driver.

    The max speed limit was 65mph. I couldn’t clearly see the speedometer from the passenger row where I was seated and don’t know if he drove the speed limit the whole 2 hour and 45 minute drive to Medford. I don’t think he drove too fast. He seemed to be driving mostly at the speed of traffic.

    The drive from Eugene to Medford goes through valleys and mountains. Some of the terrain is steep with steep inclines and a steep decent through the mountains.

    I noticed several times when the driver was speeding up to pass on the left lane a large semi truck, the semi truck had their left turn blinkers on and the driver of the van followed a car directly ahead of us to pass the semi truck in the right hand lane.

    The driver of the van effectively blocked the semi truck from turning on to the left hand lane until we had followed the car in front of us past the semi truck on the right hand lane.

    It’s not a driving maneuver I would have chosen to do and it rattled the passenger sitting next to me on the row of seats. I too was nervous that our van would get clipped by the semi truck if the semi truck merged onto the left hand lane.

    The diver of the van followed the car in front of us closely so even though the driver of the semi truck had their left turn signals on they didn’t have enough time to turn onto the left lane as the driver in front of us and the van passed the semi truck on the left hand lane.

    Another thing happened on the drive to Medford. The driver was talking a lot and listening a lot to the lady on the front passenger seat. They talked so much that the driver seemed to be giving too much attention to the lady sitting on the seat beside him and not enough attention to driving the van.

    At one point the driver intentionally swerved a little bit on the highway. It seemed like he intentionally swerved to get attention from the passengers. It was a little nerve racking when he intentionally swerved while driving at about 65mph on the highway.

    Another time I would choose to ride with a different driver.

    A driver who’s focus was a little more on driving and a little less on the lady sitting next to him. A driver who wouldn’t follow a car too close to pass a semi truck trying to turn onto the lane we were on. A driver who wouldn’t intentionally swerve while driving to get the attention of us passengers.

    We arrived from Eugene Airport in Medford at the rental car office safe.

  • A new to me car

    On Friday I went looking to buy a used car. I’d been impressed driving newer cars at work to and from the airport delivering them to the rental car company. And I’d been impressed driving newer cars at work in a local car auction. The value I experienced driving these newer cars was a motivator to buy a newer car.

    I took my minivan to the car wash and got a delux exterior wash and vacumed the inside. Then I drove home and and took warm water and soap and rags to the interior. It looked a lot better. I took miscellaneous objects in the door seats and center console and set them out of site in the glove compartment. I took out the throw rug that covered the running boar in the back of the minivan. It was ready to trade in for a newer car. The last thing I did was take the title to the minivan I owned clean and clear in my name and set it on top of the objects in the glove compartment. I was ready to trade it in.

    The first car dealership I went to was where I bought the minivan. I parked and looked around at their inventory and was not satisfied with what I saw. I drove to another local used car dealership, parked and was greeted by Jose, a salesman on the lot. I had a good feeling about Jose and he showed me about 10 cars before I found one I liked. I told Jose I was looking to trade in my minivan to offput some of the sales price on a used car.

    The car I liked is a white 2019 Kia Soul hatchback with 53,000 miles on the engine. I went on a test drive with Jose and the car felt good to drive. The sticker price on the car was $14,999. I wasn’t prepared to buy the car but I was prepared to finance a car.

    After talking about the car I liked with Jose and test driving it I was sold on the idea of applying to finance the car. Now was time for negotiation on the price. I told Jose I’d like to trade in my minivan for $2,000. While an employee of the dealership drove my minivan and had a mechanic check out the condition of the engine I sat in Jose’s office and we talked money. I asked if he could take $500 off the asking price. Jose said he could as his boss.

    Soon the employee returned with my minivan. They liked it and they wanted to finance the Kia Soul to me. They wouldn’t budge on the sales price of the Kia Soul but they did offer me $2,500 for my minivan in trade in value. I agreed with Jose to finance the Kia Soul and the employee who worked in finance at the dealership checked the numbers and prepared the paperwork for me to sign.

    It took a while for everything to be finalized but I was in no hurry and didn’t need to be anywhere else. I agreed to put $1,000 down on the Kia Soul and with the trade in money going to the Kia Soul it took another $2,500 off the $14,999. I have a good credit score and employment history working for the same company for almost 5 years. And I receive SSDI for my disability. And I had zero debt before financing the car.

    Nick who works in financing calculated a 72 month finance agreement with monthly payments of $229.98 at 11.9% interest and a requirement that I keep full coverage insurance on the car.

    Before I went looking to buy a newer car I called a local credit union and they said they would be able to get me a 5.9% interest on financing a used car in the price range I was looking to buy.

    I agreed to finance the car and signed the sales agreement Nick gave to me. I gave my minivan key to Jose and took everything in it out. Jose gave me the key to the Kia Soul and I put everything in it.

    And that was it, the car is financed to me in my name. Saturday morning I met with a lender at the Credit Union to refinance the Kia Soul and after checking out the details of the existing financing Randy confirmed with me that she car refinance the hatchback with a 5.9% interest rate when the car is registered to me. I’d already paid the dealership to register the car to me. It might take a few weeks or a month. When I receive the plates and registration in the mail I’ll make an appointment with Randy at the Credit Union to refinance the car.

    About the minivan. I bought the minivan when I was living at a Gospel Mission for men in recovery from having been homeless. I had been homeless for 6 years prior to being accepted into the Gospel Mission. After living in the Gospel Mission for several months my application for SSDI was accepted. I received a lump sum payment and am receiving monthly payments since. With the lump sum payment I put most of it into buying the minivan. My mental health had improved since moving into the Gospel Mission and I still had improvement to do. I had the idea that I would live in my minivan. I planned to move out of the Gospel Mission and into my minivan. Before making the leap at the last moment I was offered the option to rent a room in an apartment in town. I was so very relieved. I accepted the offer and moved into the apartment.

    I’d already given away the middle seats of the minivan because I thought I’d need the space on the floorboard to sleep on. When I traded in the minivan at the dealership the sales team were surprised and curious about why it was missing one set of back seats. They didn’t make a fuss about it and still gave me a good price for the minivan.

    It’s a relief not owning the minivan. I’m not a father. Many people look at a minivan and say that’s for a soccer mom or a dad. The minivan was more automobile than I needed. Yes it was reliable and I was able to do all my errands with it and even drive 3.5 hours away to the coast twice. But comparing the minivan to the hatchback, the hatchback is a better fit for me.

    Financing $11,796 with the Kia Soul is a big responsibility. $229.98 monthly payments is a significant monthly expense. Full coverage auto insurance is costing me about $50 more per month. I’ve taken on more financial responsibility with the Kia Soul.

    I feel confident I can make the full monthly payments for the Kia Soul on schedule. The newer car gets better gas mileage! The newer car has a lot of life as they say in it. The newer car is easier to park. I’ll feel more comfortable going on road trips in the Kia Soul.

    Driving an automobile and a motorcycle is a big responsibility. I’m more confident driving on four wheels and that’s what I stick to. None the less, driving on the road is a big responsibility. Safety first.

  • Increased heart rate

    I worked today. At 9am I met my co-workers at Avis Car Rental where we rode in a shuttle to the Medford Airport. At the Airport we went to the Avis car rental desk inside the terminal where I showed the woman at the desk my drivers license and signed paperwork.

    The woman at Avis said we needed to write down the mileage on the car when we arrive at our destination ( Eugene Airport) and tell it to the people at the Avis car rental desk in the Eugene Airport. It was that simple. Before I left Medford Airport I exchanged phone numbers with one of my co-workers in case there was any delay on the road trip to Eugene Airport.

    I drove a KIA Q4 from the Medford Airport to the Eugene Airport. It took me about 3.5 hours to drive there. There was light rain coming down along highway 5. Clouds filled the sky making the weather overcast.

    I drove between 65-80 mph the whole way to the Airport. The speed limit was 65 mph and I drove at the speed of traffic. The KIA Q4 I drove was a newer model. I’d checked the tread and air pressure of the tires and turn signals before leaving the Medford Airport. The car accelerated fast and the breaks worked very well. It handled a little stiff. I’m used to driving my 2011 Kia Sedona minivan. It’s a different experience than driving the small KIA Q4 sedan close to the ground.

    I felt confident behind the wheal and the highway was clear most of the route. About half way to Eugene Airport a police car pulled up behind me and followed me a ways. The police car turned on it’s lights signaling me to pull over. I was driving the speed limit when the cop pulled me over and was a little surprised because I didn’t understand why I got pulled over. The officer parked behind me and walked over to the passenger side of the car I was parked in. I rolled down the window with the touch of a button as the officer walked up to the car.

    I said, “hello Officer”. He said “do you know why I pulled you over?” I said “no”. He said so you’re aware you are being recorded indicating to his body camera. He said your registration is expired. I said. I work for People Ready and am driving this Avis rental car from Medford Airport to Eugene Airport. The Officer asked me if I had any paperwork. The Officer asked me if I had a drivers license. I had the paperwork I signed at the Avis desk at the Airport on the passenger seat. I told the Officer I had paperwork from Avis and handed the pages and my driver’s license to him.

    The officer asked me if I was driving the rental car because they needed more cars at the Eugene Airport. I said that’s my guess. The Officer brought my driver’s license and the pages back to his patrol car. 5 minutes later the Officer walked back to the rental car I was parked in and returned my driver’s license and the papers to me. He said he called Avis and told them the registration is expired. I said thank you. Good to know. And that was it. The officer walked back to his patrol car and I signaled that I was getting ready to enter traffic and drove away.

    I was relieved that the incident lasted less than 10 minutes and that I was back on the highway driving to the Eugene Airport. The moments from when the cop pulled behind me and flashed his lights for me to pull over up until the moments when the officer walked up to the parked car I was in had my heart beating rapidly.

    I knew I didn’t do anything wrong and that’s why I was surprised that he pulled me over. To me, being approached by a police officer is a high adrenalin experience because of the numerous times in the past when I interacted with police and was in trouble.

    My heart rate was fast but I was in control. I think the Officer could have noticed that I was nervous if he suspected me of anything. I felt like my hand was shaking when I handed him the papers. As I spoke it became clear that I had nothing to hide and the officer looked relieved.

    I’ve had many experiences interacting with police officers in the past and a number of them were where I was in trouble with the law. Gradually my heartbeat slowed to normal.

    I was glad to be driving again on the highway in route to the Eugene Airport. The rest of my shift at work there were no surprises. After dropping off the rental car at the Eugene Airport and giving the key to the woman at the Avis desk we all met up and rode in a van to Medford to the Avis car rental lot where I parked my minivan.

    Back at home my pet dog Sage greeted me as usual and after I cleaned up the poop she left on the floor I took Sage for a walk to a store in my neighborhood where I bought a 6 pack of beer.

    It was an early evening to bed for me.

  • Privacy

    Privacy is not guaranteed 100% when it comes to my phone. I don’t know about you but I bought my cellphone standard. It came with photo and video recording on both sides. When I’m not using my phone I set it on a flat surface. How do I know that it is not recording video or photographs while I’m not using it? When it’s idle.

    I bought a shutter cover from TikTok. It came in a pack of 20 and cost less than $10 with shipping.

    I feel relieved to know when I manually close the shutter on my phone it won’t record video and photographs. It’s not a button, it didn’t come with my phone. It’s not part of the software.

    A digital button on a screen may have more meanings than the one word title on the button. When my phone is idle, when I’m not using my phone I know it won’t record the environment it is in because, since the shutter arrived in the mail I’ve installed it on my phone lens and keep it closed.

    In recent news an elderly woman was abducted from her home. The perpetrator is being sought after by law enforcement. I hope she is found soon alive and well and returned to her family. And I hope the perp is caught and is put in prison.

    Evidence from her video camera at the entrance of her home recorded a masked person approach her residence.

    How the evidence was brought to light is a current controversy. It was reported in the news that her subscription to the video had limits. When the F.B.I. reviewed the video on the door camera they found the video record of a person wearing a mask approach the entrance to her home.

    If I had a video recorder installed at the entrance to my home I’d want to record the entrance at all times. Apparently that service costs more.

    I feel safe in my neighborhood. I don’t have a video recorder installed at the entrance to my home. It’s not about money for me.

    Apparently the technology records at all times and the owners subscription might not allow them records of the video depending on the level of their subscription.

    When the technology records at all times and only some of the records are available to a subscriber with a limited subscription it seems like the records that are unavailable to the subscriber should be made available in the case where the elderly woman was abducted from her home.

    What’s recording and what’s not recording is a real issue for many people. The current case in news reports of an elderly woman abducted from her home is an extreme event. Extreme events are reasons why people install cameras outside their homes.

    What is a safe neighborhood is constantly being defined and redefined in real time by neighbors and the daily events that take place in a neighborhood.

    My neighborhood feels safe to me. I know many of my neighbors in my apartment complex by name. I speak to them throughout the week. I look out for my neighbors and I like to think that they look out for me.

    The shutter I manually installed on the lens of my phone helps me feel confident that a hacker is not watching me through my phone. It feels more secure to manually slide the shutter over the lens closing it, instead of relying on the title of a digital button that reads “record” when I haven’t pressed it.

  • Tea and Coffee

    I’m feeling thankful. I enjoy buying a cup of tea or coffee to sit with in a cafe and sip. Sipping a hot cup of coffee or an iced coffee on a cold day brings comfort to me. Enjoying this experience in a cafe I value very much. I live with my pet dog and three plants in an apartment I lease. Leaving home and going to a nearby cafe is something I find pleasure in.

    There are social bonds made over a cup of tea. Whether I go alone or with a friend greeting a barista is one piece of the bond. A simple, hello how are you, thank you makes me feel more human than putting coins into a vending machine for a beverage. Cafe’s are often busy environments where people come and go with their cups of coffee and to sit at a table in a cafe or outside on a patio.

    I was homeless twice. Once at age 30 for one year and then again at age 35 for 6 years. When I could afford to buy a cup of coffee or tea I would often go to a cafe and sit at a table enjoying every drop. Often I was dirty and my clothes were dirty but as long as I had several dollars to spend I was able to buy a selection of the beverages they made and sit in comfort at a table for an hour.

    It was great to be inside where the temperature was warm and the environment was clean. It was great to sit on a chair at a table in relative peace as the world and people in it continued with the day.

    Homeless people often have a difficult time being welcome in clean warm environments. A few dollars to spend on a cup of tea might be why a homeless person is at a table in a cafe. That’s not always the case. Many homeless people struggle with mental health weaknesses. I’ve struggled with mental health weaknesses for almost 21 years. When I was homeless I rarely took medication to support my mental health and had a difficult time relating to many people.

    Not taking medication for my mental health was one major factor why I was homeless. I was making bad decisions that effected my health and my safety and well being and not taking medication for my mental health made it worse.

    I closed my business and no longer had any income and soon ran out of savings and could no longer pay the lease for the house where I was living. Soon I had to leave the house and became homeless. I could not afford to pay for the lease on my car and had to return it to the bank who had given me the loan. Soon I could no longer afford to keep everything I owned in storage and lost all my possession’s.

    I had the clothes I wore and a backpack filled with things I needed to help me live outside.

    I am very lucky that through intervention I got on a safe and supportive path and back into housing. I’ve had a home for the last 4.5 years. I am a lucky man. There are many people, men and women I have to thank who helped me get on a safe path and back into housing.

    I went back to work 4 years ago. It feels great to work and earn money. I am able to save some money and pay my bills. I cherish my home. My home is in a safe neighborhood in a thriving community. I keep my home clean and bright. It’s great to have a “place” my home to stay safe and secure in. Protected away from harsh weather and dangerous persons.

    Being in good company with cups of tea in a cafe is a blessing of living in society.

  • Recently I’ve felt sad for ways I harmed people when I was a troubled youth. I would like to apologize to them and the truth is most of the people I harmed I did not know and never met. The people I called my friends then were experimenting with drugs. We smoked marijuana, we took LSD, we got drunk, we ate psylocibin mushrooms, we smoked cigarettes. We were often high on drugs or in-between getting high on drugs.

    We stole cars. We stole parked cars that we learned how to hotwire. We would drive them around town for a few days then abandon them somewhere completely different than where we stole them from. We stole a minivan one night and had a crazy idea to drive from where we were in Colorado to Canada. The group of us so called friends were fourteen, fifteen and sixteen year olds.

    We stole license plates from another car and attached them to the minivan in an effort to hide the fact that we were driving a stolen minivan. We drove north to Wyoming where we ran out of gas in the city of Casper. We had no money and left the minivan parked on the side of a road. We walked to a mall where our plan was we would sell fake LSD to kids and use the money on fuel. School was probably in session and we found no one to sell our fake LSD to. When we returned to the minivan Casper Police caught us.

    We were put in the Casper Jail in a separate area from adults where we stayed a night. I remember being alone  in an interrogation room waiting for an officer to ask me questions and looking at the brown wood covered walls and how the design of the walls looked horrifying. When the officer entered the room he asked me questions and I told him my version of what happened.

    One of the kids dad drove to Casper to pick him up. Me and the other kid were put on a greyhound bus back to Colorado where our parents picked us up the next day. I remember my dad picking me up where the bus dropped us off and seeing how angry he was with me. He drove me to the police station where I was processed and he left.

    From the police station I rode in a van with other youth who were in trouble to the Mountain View Detention Center where I stayed for one month. After it was all said and done I was ordered by the court to pay restitution to the owner of the stolen minivan. If I was not on probation before the incident I was definitely on probation at that point.

    Those were difficult times for me and for the people I harmed when I stole their property. In retrospect all these years later I look back and am grateful I got caught by the authorities when I did. I’m glad I was ordered to pay restitution to a fund for the victim and I’m glad I stayed a night in jail and stayed one month in the juvenal detention center and was put on probation.

    At that point in my life I needed correction by the authorities and beyond the ways my dad tried to put me on a safe and productive path.

    Sometimes I think about how horrible it would be to wake up and get ready to work or to bring your children to school or to go shopping and to find that your vehicle was stolen. I played a role in the theft of as much as five cars including the minivan with our group of so called friends and in those acts caused as many victims.

    I am grateful I moved far away from the community where I was living and got in a lot of trouble. I’m grateful I’m far away from each and every one of those bad influences. I’m grateful that I was able to start over in a community that is new to me. I’m grateful to be here at home safe and sound in my community and happy that I don’t know any people who do drugs and happy that I don’t know any people who sell drugs.

    I was homeless when I moved here from Colorado and was homeless in this community for four more years before I got into a recovery program and started taking medication I need for my mental health. When I was homeless I received very much help from volunteers who provided meals to the homeless and volunteers who opened up shelters to sleep in on very cold nights.

    Since getting into recovery, I’ve received help and support from very many professionals at work in social services. I have a home I lease in a safe neighborhood. The neighborhood feels safe to me. I volunteered with a local organization for nine months helping people in need in my community escape poverty. It feels good giving back.

    Often I think about my minivan I own. I think that it is parked in a safe location and locked and that it will be there where I parked it when I return to it. Thinking about my minivan locked and parked in a safe location is a comfortable feeling.

    I feel confident in thinking that my minivan is waiting for me to drive it when I am ready to drive. Whether I’m driving to work or to buy groceries or to do errands, the thought of my minivan I parked in my safe neighborhood and locked is a good thought. The thought is basic. I parked it at a specific spot and it should be there when I return to it.

    As a resident of the apartment building I lease and community I live in I feel valued as a neighbor who looks out for my neighbors. As the owner of the minivan, I am responsible for maintaining it and for keeping the plates registered and keeping the registration current and keeping it insured.

    This is about being responsible for my property. Making sure that my minivan is in good working condition is my responsibility as the owner and driver.

    I know that writing this does not make good on the victims of the cars I played a role in the theft of many years ago when I was a teenager. It’s ok. I have forgiven myself. I believe in karma. I don’t know what the future will bring. I like to think that my most difficult days are in my past. And I know that experiencing problems happens in life and life is worth living through the ups and downs. Life is precious. Every moment including this one.

  • I recently went to an appointment I scheduled at the local US Post Office where I applied for a Passport. I brought my application already filled out. The meeting went well and the employee I met asked me if I had any questions. I did not. He also asked me if I am a US Citizen. I confirmed that I am a US Citizen. That was it. He kept my birth certificate which will be mailed to me when my application is done being processed. I was done with my meeting within 10 minutes.

    The first time I applied for a Passport was exciting. I was in my early 20’s and preparing to travel to islands in the Caribbean and French West Indies. Since then my Passport expired and I legally changed my name. I received an email from the US Passport Agency stating that they need more information from me. I need to provide my certified legal change of name document to complete my application. Since my last Passport expired I became homeless and lost all my possessions other than the clothes I wore and a backpack of supplies for living outdoors. I lost the documentation I received from the Court when my legal change of name was finalized. Since then I’ve got back into stable and secure housing thank God and thanks to the support of many professional men and women at work helping troubled Americans every day of the year.

    I was relieved when I called the Clerk of Court in the County where I was living when I changed my name for a record request and learned that I could fill out the record request at their website. It took less than five minutes to fill out the record request and only charged me $20 for a certified copy of my legal change of name decree issued by the Judge who granted me my name change.

    I was also relieved to learn that I should receive the documentation within one week. I don’t currently have plans to travel internationally although I want to be ready to travel. My Passport application might take as long as 90 days to process because I didn’t ask for it to be expedited. That’s fine by me.

    When I was younger I traveled to Mexico and to Canada and only needed my Gov issued photo ID card to cross those international borders. Times have changed and my current Drivers License is not Real ID certified. New Passports are Real ID certified so I’ll be able to use it to fly domestically and internationally.

    I flew last year before the Real ID policy was in effect and was able to fly domestically using my Drivers License. Like I said, times have changed. Gov issued Real ID have improved security features and tie a person to their digital identity, online habits, online behavior and biometrics. I think this is good business and will improve safety for generations to come.

    I love to travel and I love to fly. Although flying can be somewhat nerve racking I’ve always arrived safe and sound at my intended destination. I’m fortunate that most of my flights were on schedule. And flights I’ve taken that were delayed did not take too long. Once when I was flying home from Costa Rica to Denver I flew into Miami where my connecting flight to Denver was delayed for over 10 hours. The airline paid for a Hotel room for me for the night and drove me to the Hotel. It was a fancy Hotel near a pier off the Atlantic Coast. The next morning I took a taxi cab to the Airport and my connecting flight to Denver departed on schedule. All’s well that ends well.

    The scariest flight I took was from Alamosa Colorado to Denver’s Stapleton Airport on a winter day sometime in the late 1980’s. The airplane was small and held maybe one dozen passengers. When there was turbulence the airplane altitude seemed to raise and dip a lot. We landed safe and sound at Stapleton Airport and that’s what’s most important.

    Here’s to many more safe travels! Well planned vacations! Safe roadways, safe railroads, safe waterways and friendly skies. Wishing safe travels to you and your loved ones.

    Jason A. Greenwood

  • Free

    At a young age I was taught “freedom isn’t free”. I didn’t understand the meaning at first and over time as I grew older I gradually began to learn meanings of the sentiment. It’s a truth I understand much clearer today. Freedom isn’t free refers to many things. One in particular is freedom of speech. As a human I have the freedom to speak when and where and to who I want to. I have the freedom to say what I want to, and there are consequences.

    Like in science, for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. Speech follows similar responses. Speaking with someone I agree with more often returns a favorable response. Speaking with someone I disagree with might not return a favorable response depending on the words that are the topic of conversation.

    Young people learn this early on. Friends group together and entertain themselves and one group of friends often share many of the same words and lingo in their communications. Where a different group of friends have their own unique lingo and expressions. These two groups of friends are important to each other.

    While a person in one group of friends might not often speak to people in the other group of friends in United States the English language is a common bridge people use to communicate. While English is the most widely spoken language in United States it is far from the only language people speak in this country.

    Growing up in United States I was encouraged to learn a second language. The options in my middle school were French and German and Spanish. I learned some words in each of these languages. Later I chose Spanish as my second go to language beyond the English language. I was brought up speaking English. English is my first language. I speak some Spanish. I value my ability to speak Spanish and enjoy learning Spanish words. My ability to read and write Spanish is limited.

    I believe when a person is able to communicate in a second language they strengthen their relation to other people from different cultures. It’s important to me to have good relations with other cultures. Here in Medford Oregon most people speak English. Many other languages are spoken in my community and are fewer and further between. English sounds “normal” to me.

    When I lived in Los Angeles I was surrounded by people speaking many different languages. It took getting used to. Los Angeles is one of the largest cities on Earth with one of the largest amount of people on Earth. Getting used to living in the megalopolis of Los Angeles was difficult. There are many reasons getting used to Los Angeles was difficult for me. It was a challenge and the challenge it was to me I am grateful for.

    Challenges are important. It might be interpreted as a challenge to speak to someone in a different group of friends because they might sound different than what you’re used to. They might dress different than what your used to. Their lingo are likely to be different than what your used to. These differences while at first may feel like a challenge to start up a conversation, the challenge is worth it.

    Unfortunately when I was young I got into trouble in and out of school. I made bad decisions and suffered the consequences. The group of people I surrounded myself with were similar to a gang. We liked each other and we were sometimes suspicious and skeptical of people who were outside of our group. We caused problems individually and as a group. We grew older causing more problems to ourselves and to others. We compromised our freedoms collectively and individually and compromised freedoms of people we wronged.

    I moved far away, over 1,000 miles away from the “community” I was raised in. I’m no longer under the influence of negative and dangerous people. I’m fortunate that I was able to move far away from those influences and start fresh in this community. There are many people in this community. People I care about and people I know and respect. Life experiences have taught me to be around people who have my best interest in mind. People who respect themselves and others. These are the people I consider my inner circle. People looking to make the world a better place right here in this community.

    Moving far away from where I was raised was not easy. It was worth it. Moving to a community that was new to me was not easy. It was worth it. Not everyone can or have reason to or should move from where they are raised. Many people learn early on to respect themselves and others and look out for one another.

    The most successful people in a community often are raised in the community the live and grow up in to adulthood and as an elder. This is an example of people with no reason to move from where they were raised. This is the epitome of stability and structure.

    On the other hand many people choose to move from where they were raised and for many reasons. A work opportunity is a reason why a person might move to a new community, possibly very far from where they were raised. Economic factors often play a part in these decisions.

    People who learn early on to respect themselves and others are more prepared to make the most with the community they live in. and if they move to a community new to them are best equipped to thrive in it. The same goes for moving domestically and moving internationally. I don’t have experience moving internationally.

    I have experience traveling on vacation internationally and learned from my travels, life outside United States while similar in many ways is very different than living in United States.

    A common saying goes, to learn is to travel. Depending on where you travel you might learn things you want to and things you didn’t want to learn. Both are true and depending on the reason for your travel will make a difference in what there is to learn about.

    Things people consider free are different in different cultures. What Americans living in United States consider free vary widely to what citizens of a foreign country consider free in their country.

    Freedom is very important. Freedom to live in peace and in a stable economy are not free.