Avoiding temptation and focusing on what’s good

I’m at home sitting at my desk.

Yesterday I went to a local park with a basketball court and brought my basketball. A mom was shooting hoops on the other side of the court with her two young children. I practiced by myself at one end shooting hoops and worked up a little sweat and got my heart pumping. A man was seated on a bench in the shade. One of the kids playing with his family on the court walked over to the man and they started talking. I think the man was probably the child’s dad.

After a while of me making about 70% of the shots in the basket a young woman with her dog showed up near the court and sat down in the sunlight along the wall. She was beautiful. It was obvious to me that she was also homeless. She looked like she needed a new set of clothes and a shower and a good meal. I noticed that her breasts were hanging almost all the way out of her shirt. I continued shooting hoops and locked eyes with her several times.

After a while she got up and walked with her dog to where she sat at a picnic table in the shade beside a homeless man.

I was tempted to approach her and offer to buy her a meal. I didn’t. When I was done on the basketball court I set my basketball in my minivan, locked it and walked over to the calisthenics equipment in the park and exercised for a while. A woman and child were sitting on the grass talking. A man was sitting and reading in the shade under a large tree.

My thoughts kept going back to the beautiful young homeless woman.

When I was done exercising, I drove home. On the drive home I thought more about the beautiful young homeless woman and hoped she was able to find safety and the things she needed to get housing.

I knew better. I knew from my own experience when I was homeless that although in one day a person can go from homeless to being housed it’s a process that takes a lot of time, days weeks and months of safe steady support in a stable healthy environment through the help of many people focused on helping a homeless person back into housing. That’s not my work.

Sometimes I buy a homeless person a meal or hand a homeless person several dollars or my pocket change. I don’t trust that giving a homeless person I do not know more than a few dollars is a wise decision to make as a gift.

I’m glad I didn’t approach the young beautiful homeless woman. I’m glad I didn’t speak to her. Looking her in the eyes was enough.

Was she exposing her breasts to me on purpose or was she trying to be comfortable is not my business. I knew I could not help her and knew that approaching her would tempt me in ways that would not get her into permanent housing.

Thinking more about the healthy strong families there in peace visiting the park while I exercised helped me to not lust after the beautiful young nearly topless homeless woman I could not help.

I hope the homeless woman who was at the park makes it to where she is safe and supported and gets the help she needs to get into safe stable housing and a better future.