5 years ago this week

I “graduated” from living in a secure mental health rehab facility. I moved into a motel room.

Leading up to police intervention that put me in a psychiatric hospital I had been homeless living outdoors most nights for 6 years. My story is a miracle. Today I’m writing from my desk in my room in the apartment I lease. I have a job and a car I’m financing. I live half way across the country from the negative influences that had a grip on me and caused me to make very wrong choices and unhealthy actions that led me to homelessness.

Writing every memory from when I was homeless feels impossible and not necessary. What’s important is that I went from having lost all my possessions other than the clothes I wore and a backpack and relying on hand outs from strangers and food stamps to eat to living in a good apartment I furnished in a good neighborhood in a thriving community.

There are many people I can thank for making my life as I know it possible. Over the years I was homeless very many volunteers helped me survive. People I had never met opened warming centers and shelters at night on some of the coldest snowy icy nights when I slept warm and safe inside.

Many years before I became homeless I was diagnosed with bipolar syndrome and then years later my mental health deteriorated and I my diagnosis became scitzophrenia. I am very fortunate that medication for these diseases are cheap. Still for years I was very adverse to taking any prescribed medication and did not take my prescription regularly or at all.

When I became homeless for 6 years I had not taken medication for my scitzophrenia for over two years. Being placed in the psychiatric hospital got me back on my prescription. That is where my rehabilitation began. It seems like I was in the psychiatric hospitals for 3 months. I started taking my prescribed medication every day. I participated in group therapy and met with a psychiatrist regularly while I was staying in the psychiatric hospital.

I remember while staying in the psychiatric hospital for meals us patients were given plastic utensils that were the shape of a spoon and a for combined to eat with. No fork, no spoon, no butter knife. One utensil to eat with. It was part of the rehabilitation. At first I was given sandwiches and food I could eat with my hands. Only later was I given a spork utensile to eat with. After a while I was given a fork and a spoon and a butter knife to eat with.

The number one and number two threats patients in psychiatric hosptials are is to themselves and to others. It took three months of constant supervision and video surveillance of me including me willingly taking my prescribed medication every day before I rehabilitated to when I was free to leave.

During that time I was in contact with a professional working for social services. When I was released from the mental health rehabilitation facility the social services professional met me and drove me to a motel and paid for a room for me to stay in for one month. He also helped me get donated food from a local organization that helps food insecure people and he helped buy me some cooking equipment to use with the microwave in the room I was staying in, in the motel.

During the day I visited the public library and with my food benefit card I made some food purchases at a store near the motel. I was still used to living outside and spent most of the month in the motel room. During that time I also went to the police station and gave them my fingerprints and agreed to go to a court date that was scheduled for the crime I was accused of while homeless with a warrant for me attached to it. The warrant was dropped.

After the warrant was dropped I was welcomed to the Gospel Mission where I lived for 6 months in the mens dorm room on a cot. In the Gospel Mission I went to church every Sunday and studied the bible during the week. I did chores every day and I helped cook meals for the residents. While living in the Gospel Mission my biological family helped me apply for SSDI. After several months I was awarded SSDI.

While living in the Gospel Mission I went to my scheduled court date where an attorney was appointed to defend me because I could not afford to hire one. During sentencing I was given one year of bench probation and ordered to continue to meet with a psychiatrist for as long as the psychiatrist recommended. The Judge also said to me and made it clear that I would need to take my prescribed medication for the rest of my life. I agreed with the Judge and apologized for my behavior that got me in trouble.

I moved to an apartment in December where I had my own room living with 3 other adults, men and women. I lived in the apartment for one year. After living in the apartment for 10 months I went back to work part time for a temp to hire employment agency. During that time I also sought out a therapist from a online list of therapists at psychology.com. I scheduled a telehealth appointment with her and have been meeting with her regularly since.

One year after moving into the apartment I moved into my own apartment I lease to this day. I started meeting with the therapist in person in my living room regularly. Meeting with the therapist in my home was a significant improvement to meeting with her via telehealth. Since then we started meeting at a local cafe I recommended where we now meet regularly. My therapist signed off on paperwork that enabled me to get a pet therapy dog.

I completed bench probation and went to each and every meeting scheduled with a psychiatrist and therapist until it was no longer a requirement.

I’m doing much better these days. I take care of my dog and take her on walks. My credit score improved. I went on a vacation to visit my biological family three years ago. I flew to Colorado and to Florida and visited my parents in both states. I rented a car in Florida and drove from the airport to where I stayed in a guest room in the assisted living residence where my mom lives.

Two summers ago I went on vacation and rented a car and drove to Washington to visit my sister and her family.

Last summer my mom and my half sister Hannah visited me and stayed with me in my home on separate visits.

This Spring I went on a 3 day vacation where I rented a room in an Inn beside upper Rogue River and fished for trout and salmon. I caught 5 fish and they were all under 1 foot and released all of them. I brought my dog who was patient at the waters edge while I fished.

Since getting back from the fishing trip I financed a car. I traded in my old minivan and the value was put into the car I financed through the dealership. I also became a member of the Church I began attending in February.

I am a success story in living flesh.